snolasriahdame

I've got a few tricks up my sleeve.  Greatalmightyqueen and thunderjam1992 have officially lit this huuuge bonfire under my ass with their HARPG Racing progenies, and I am working on a STHUPER STHECRET PROJECKT GAIS.  I'm really excited.  I started rough drafting for the first piece this evening after I finished a paper.  I'm so excited.  I don't think anyone has a clue.  hahaha.  

On another note, my entry for Thowra 's contest is almost complete!!  I just need to do some mane and tail drawing and shading, finalize shading on the horse, and then a background and jot some story ideas down.  And holy cow.  you should see my entry.  I have a WIP of it in my gallery, but it's come a ways from there.  The face is still perfection for digital painting for me.  Like, it looks so realistic.  I'm strugggling really hard to make the body look as good.  It's tough.  hahaha.  

Keep an eye out for action from Call Me Dapper Farms... you never know what's around the corner!!  *cackles and runs away*  

   
It's got a Daily Deviation.  
but holy shit.  this is absolutely amazing.

Soooooo.  Hey there!  Haha.
I would like to apologize to all who watch me or all who are waiting on something from me, and even those who I talk to.  
I'm sorry.  I have been lacking in everything on here, and I have lost a lot of my interest in drawing.  I still sketch, but I don't do much anymore.  At this point, I'm going to finish anything I owe people, and that's probably going to be it.  I really hate it, because I can't seem to find any inspiration ever anymore, and I hardly ever actually remember to check my deviantart.  If anyone wants their characters that I've adopted back, I understand, and that's fine, you can probably find them a better home.  It's crazy in college, and as much as people say that, it's true.  I don't even write.  
So I'm sorry.  =/

Danica

Well, I'm officially a college student as of today.  I moved in today... or yesterday since it's 2:20 AM here.  but yeah.  Hahaha.  
I'm actually working on my entry for hypnocampus's contest, failed-romance-x.deviantart.co…, and I'm about halfway done with teh picture.  xD  I just need to work on teh Bio, but I've got an idea that's starting to form in mind already.  
I'm really excited about this contest, I really want to make a character that is an embodiment of me and part of myself, but who's unique and part of something.  Like.  Yeah.  

Annyway.  I'll have time tomorrow to work more on my picture, and then Monday I'll hopefully have some time as well.  Classes start Tuesday, so I'll let you all know how life's going once that starts.  Have a lovely day/night!!!

Danica<3

(Wishing You Were Here)



Soooo, I got the return letter from Zak.  
Me trying to get him back just won't happen, but I'm okay with that.  
The real reason he brok up with me is because he fell out of love.  And that's nothing to be ashamed of.  It happens, that's what people do, it's part of our human nature to change.  

Danica,
You believe your entitled to answers and I agree with that, so I will address your questions as best I understood them, written and unwritten.

I did not talk to you because I know how much you cared about me. Your letter and the content within confirms the wealth of feelings you have for me. There is no doubt in my mind that you would have tried to change yourself to stay with me. What kind of person would I be if I forced you to compromise yourself? I'd be the very thing I find most disgusting int eh world, a manipulator.

Why would breaking up be better? So you wouldn't have to endure months worth of pain because of a deterioaring relationship and so I wouldn't be usingg you and feeling miserable for it. Would you have truly preferred a breakup during your freshman year, when your away from your home and friends, alone and alienated in an unfamiliar location? I'm not cruel Danica, or at least I don't have cruel intentions. I can't bring myself to be so mean as to do that to you.

I'm sure you believe I had ulterior motives; you've undoubtly reasoned that if I ommited some reasons then I must be ommiting more. I know my credibility is shot at this point, but I'm not hiding anything from you. I left out certain reasons because I didn't want to turn the whole affair into an argument, the last words between us full of anger and resent.

As for what I'm thinking, I'm thinking that you need to get over me. Let go. You've already made it clear that you don't want to be friends, so just cut loose cause you have nothing to lose. Thinking about me and lamenting over our breakup will only hold you back, no good will come of it. I'll become a crutch for you to lean on, your excuse for not wanting to move on with relationships you'll form in college. There are much better people in the world than me and you'll see this.

I'm also thinking that you'll get mad at some of your friends for hanging out with me, but I certainly hope you won't. I think your better than that.

I didn't write this letter to convince you that I'm right or anything like that. I wrote this so you can understand why I did what I did, whether right or wrong, or something in between.

Zak


that's his response letter.
I'm not upset anymore about it, but the other day i was crying.  cause he sees himself so unclearly, and he obviously does care if he didn't have the heart to tell me he didn't love me anymore.  and while i kind of am upset about it, it's his way of showing he cares.  
like, it sucks, cause he is a great guy.  but we're not really meant for each other anymore.  at one point, we were great together, and now we're just not the same, and that's okay.  it's okay to not love someone anymore.  



Annnyyywho.  
My HARPG stable is fairly inactive, but I've decided that's okay after having looked around the horse art community.  I enjoy drawing horses and making pictures, but I don't want to spend all of my free time throwing myself into it.  If I feel inspired, I'll definitely be thrown into it, but it's not my top priority.  
I'm starting college on September 5th basically, moving in the 4th, and classes start the 8th.  But I will have things going on between when I get there and classes starting.  I'll probably look to drawing as a way to unwind at the end of the day each night and do some work on one piece.  I'll work on a different one each night so that I don't get bored of any of them, and I'll see where that goes.  
I'm not sure how much free time I'll end up with, I honestly expect almost no free time, but seeing as how I have one class on Wednesdays and Fridays and only two on Thursdays and Mondays, I have a feeling I'll have more time than I'm figuring for.  
So in free time, I'm really going to try and do some work, cause I do enjoy this, but absolutely NOTHING will be forced.  I will work at my own pace, and that's that.  


In other news, two of my friends are officially off at college, and a handful are leaving within the next three or four days.  It's crazy that I'll be the last to leave, when I'm pretty much the first one who knew where I wanted to go and exactly what I wanted to do.  

Now I must be off, I get a chance to see one of my friends before she leaves either tomorrow or Friday, and then later tonight I'm hanging out with my main group of friends for the last time before we all leave for school.  


Love, Peace, and Happinessss!!

D!Pav